I hate my mum.

Being a teenager, these words have escaped my mouth countless times but I can honestly say, not once have I meant them. Sure, there have been moments where I’ve really disliked my mum due to the explosive arguments but the anger blows over and the subject of argument is dropped.

It has taken me seventeen years to realise that I only have one mum and she’s not going to be around forever which is a shame because now that this unfortunate truth has come to light in my life, I feel like we’ve wasted a lot of time arguing rather than appreciating each other while we can.

During an argument, the fact that my mum is the woman who carried me for nine months, dealt with restless nights and illness, the pain of child birth then tended to me in the early hours of the morning, soothed me when I cried, put clothes on my back and a roof over my head, dealt with break ups, make up stains on new carpets, driving me to parties, making me soup when I was ill in bed, helped me with homework. bought me my Christmas and birthday presents and told me she’d be proud of me no matter what I achieved in life, slips my mind and I’ve said hurtful things that I cannot take back regardless of all the things my mum has done for me. I am at the age now where this has hit me like a ton of bricks and there have been times where I’m so scared that I’ve gone too far and the mother-daughter relationship we have is beyond restoration but I was wrong. The love of a mother is unconditional and I will forever be grateful for this. My mum has endured hearing me say hurtful things, telling her I don’t want to live with her anymore and I’m happier when I’m not home and yet, she still allows me to cry on her shoulder when I need to.

No matter where I go, be it America or Australia or the North Pole, my mum has done a good job raising me and loving me in order to give me assurance that, even if she kicks me out because she’s sick of me not following house rules or the arguments, with her is my home and I will always be welcome back to it with open arms and to me, this is really important.

When I sit back to look at it, I have a very good mum who has brought up four children and none of us make it easy all the time, we can be very difficult and for her to be a mum to all of us can’t be the simplest job on Earth. Me and my mum have clashed, flipped, turned and burned but she’s still my mum and she’s the only mum I’m ever going to get. She is the role model I’ll be following when I raise my own children and she will continue to be the woman I run to for advice and I can only hope that in a year or so, when I’ve grown up, that we can go out into town and on shopping trips and put all of the arguments behind us as now I have realised that not everyone is as lucky to have a mum like mine.

I dare say that a few of you are probably the same with your parents, arguing all the time and telling them you hate them or not saying thank you if your mum has tidied your room or refusing to put your clothes away because you’re busy doing your own thing but I beg you to remember that you only get one dad, one mum and they will not be around forever so start appreciating everything they do for you now and you will not have to regret the time you wasted being angry or upset with them. Be grateful for what they give you, the world is a difficult place to survive and your parents have managed to do it and at the same time, bring up a child to the best of their ability so do not throw away the time you have with them.

If any of you ever want to talk about your relationship with your parents, carers and so on, I’m no agony aunt but I will try and give you the best honest advice that I possibly can so  talk to me on Twitter or E-mail me or chat on Facebook



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  1. August 14, 2014 / 10:02 pm

    Love this post! I have only ever told my mum I hated her once when I was about 11, and it upset me as soon as I’d said it so I vowed never to again and to this day I haven’t. My nanan always tells me ‘hate is a very strong word, be careful how you use it.”

  2. August 19, 2014 / 11:57 pm

    Love your posts, you’re very insightful and intuitive! It seems most people don’t realize what they’ve got until it’s gone, unfortunately. Great post. =)

  3. August 27, 2014 / 5:32 pm

    This moment of “She really WAS doing it in my best interests” only dawned when I was about 21. I was an absolute pain in the butt but am so glad my parents persevered, I’m friggin awesome now.. 😉

    Great post!
    Love Zoe x

  4. January 6, 2015 / 12:27 pm

    Thanks for your thoughts on this, Courtney. Having grown up with a single mum, this post brings to mind the many times I have not been kind to her in return for her warmth and love. I am glad you realized this at 17, which means you have some of your most fruitful years ahead to enjoy the friendship that you will cultivate with your own mother. Enjoy the moments together, and pull out the ol’ Kodak to record them.

  5. September 21, 2016 / 2:12 am

    Sadly more people need to realise what you’ve wrote in this post. It shows your maturity in figuring all of this out for yourself though. Don’t beat yourself up over any of it, you have the time left to spend time together and make the most of every moment and I’m sure she knows you love her.. It’s a common part of growing up and it’s only natural that there will come a time for arguments and friction between ourselves and the people closest to us.

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